Update...

I'm feeling pretty uninspired these days, so I haven't been writing anything.

I did get drafted into my first mission trip with the youth, but I already told you about that. I had an amazing time. The kids were pretty good, and the leadership was exceptional. We have a group of college kids who feel called into ministry and who work with the youth groups of our church. These interns are really on fire for the Lord, and so cool that the kids do whatever they ask. I mean, they are like the cool big brothers and sisters that they don't want to disappoint.

Which works!

The kitchen duties seemed overwhelming at first, but everything just flowed. I had a great team, and we worked together well. The kitchen was a little under-supplied, but the serving facilities were awesome! I got some good intel from our own kitchen lady, and she steered me in the right direction. Everything she said was spot on, and it was like she'd been doing this for 30 years or more. (she has...)

And the comments from the kids were so encouraging! "This is the best thing I ever ate!" was something I heard more than once. One of the interns declared the food the best camp food he'd ever had, then informed me that he'd been to camp A LOT!

Makes this kitchen lady smile, just thinking about it.

Meanwhile, God had a few things to show me while I was there. He took me out of my comfort zone to give me a little perspective on my own circumstances. Gave me a word just for me.

I needed to hear from Him, and He spoke. Revealed some personal sin to me, and told me He's gonna use me to do some work. So I've been praying a lot and staying in a general attitude of willingness to be used.

I decided to go to the church gym yesterday and get busy walking and rope jumping again, when I was snagged by the new trainer. Seems this lady was told by the Lord to help out anyone who would come, and she took my presence for willingness.

Stink.

So now I'm going daily at 10 and doing 30 minutes of cardio and about an hour of weight training.

I say that like I have been doing it for weeks, instead of two days.

Hey, commitment can come after such a short time!

'Scuse me while I hobble off to the hot tub...

Outside the Comfort Zone

I'm not really sure what happened. It really just sneaked (snuck??) up on me.

I got a call from a friend, who is organizing youth functions for our church.

"Diane, I have a need, and your name just keeps coming to mind. I was wondering if you would be willing to work on the cooking team for the mid-high mission trip next week."

Hmmm. Let me think. I am pretty free these days, but I have a Pampered Chef party next Friday at my house... (which my husband is secretly looking forward to, because it means the house will be clean...)

We will be back in time for that? Well, let me see if I can arrange childcare.

*Childcare mysteriously falls into place...

Okay, I'm in.

"Good, you will be feeding fifty people, and I need a menu and grocery list as soon as possible."

WHAT?!?!?! I thought I was just going to be HELPING, not PLANNING!!

I am NOT A PLANNER!!

*Groan... opens excel to build a menu spreadsheet...

Side kick

Okay, so you probably noticed that I have been missing for a little while. I have been having a family crisis. And since most of you are facebook friends, you likely already know of which I speak. But just in case someone is out of the loop, I'll link you to my sister's blog and you can read her version. It's her story, really. I'm just the BFF, who has jumped in as hero support.

I make a good side-kick.

Hmm... gonna have to think of a good side-kick name...

Meanwhile, I'm stewing on the sidelines with a few good zingers, which the fact that I'm trying to do the upright thing, won't allow me to scream.

We aren't really sure what to expect next, but since I'm really bad "at this game" of remembering details, even five minutes after things happen, (according to my sister, :) I have written a detailed account, for any event which should require me to recall stuff.

Thankfully, my kids are getting old enough to see what this has done to our family. I have shielded them from the truth, because it is so hard to understand, for children. Shoot! I'm almost 40, and I still don't get it. But this time, they have seen it all. They have seen the destruction and the pain. They have witnessed the brokenness and heartache. But the best thing, is that they have seen that real love doesn't always come from family. Sometimes it comes from friends and sometimes it comes from people you barely know.

And God has been with us through it all. They have seen me rely on Him in a way I never have before, giving glory to God all the way. What more could I ask for?

Lava Rock Girl.

I'm going with that one.

SO busy!

It is almost noon and what have I done today? I have been outside for a walk/run and taken a nap. I have read a bit and facebooked a bit. I have prayed for a while and caught up on a few blogs I enjoy. Basically, I have done nothing. At this very moment my children are watching their second hour of television, and their brains are turning to mush.
It 's not like I have nothing to do, mind you.
The house is a mess.
The boat needs to be finished getting clean.
The laundry should be going.
The dogs need bathed.
The wallpaper in Caleb's room needs to be finished being stripped.
I have guests coming over for dinner, and I'm not really sure what we are having yet.
I should really get busy.
After I lay out...

The Testimony of the Dogs

All day today the dogs have been following me around the house. They are freaking out at the flurry of activity. The fact that I am wearing shoes bears witness that I am ready to leave them, and I have left them a lot in the past ten months. They are used to me sitting on the couch under a blanket whenever I am home, so watching me scurry around doing laundry and dishes is rocking their little world. They'll get over it.

And..... I'm back!

Wow! Today is literally the first day of the rest of my life.
Yesterday I told Caleb I was so excited for today. "Why?" He wondered...
Because I get to do laundry. And dishes. And scrub the toilets. And mow the grass. And chop some wood. And. And. And...
Yes, after ten months of diverting my attention to the cause of paying tuition for Hailey, I am returning to my assigned role of stay-at-home-mom and homeschool teacher.
I'd like to think that I am wiser. I know for sure that I am stronger. (and thinner) :-)
When I emerge from the mountain of chores that have awaited my attention for so long, I will share what led me to this place, and details of the growing I have done this past school year.
I have missed you all, almost as much as I have missed my children.
But not quite. ;-)

Crow~ It's What's for Dinner

I feel a ramble coming on.
Yesterday I was the object of a virtual girl-gang fight, and it was absolutely surreal. Not only did I not see it coming, I didn't think it was warranted at all. But in the end, I caved. I didn't want to. I still don't want to. But I did it for Christians and for the sake of doing the right thing. In spite of the fact that I think the instigator of the mess was completely in the wrong. Way to take one for the Lord, eh? Well, let me tell ya. The fact that I am still not happy about eating it should show just how much of a hypocrite I feel like.
Sometimes doing the right thing TOTALLY SUCKS!!!
I told Shawn, after I ended it, that it is almost like the fight I'm in for my health. I don't want to eat the salad. I want the cake. But the cake is only for immediate satisfaction. So I put on my big girl panties and eat the salad. All the while, grumbling under my breath that the cake would have been much yummier. I didn't do the right thing because I wanted to, I did it because I HAD to. So what if I don't want to? The result is the same. I am fed and have the results of a good decision under my belt.
SNORT-literally!
Meanwhile, I feel battered emotionally by someone I have kept contact with over the years, solely in the hopes that she will be drawn to the things of the Lord. I know I'm not a perfect example of Christianity. HELLO? I'm more than a hundred pounds overweight! Somewhere I have idols that are quite obvious.
I wanted so badly to lash out with the pain and defensiveness that I felt. In fact, I still feel it. I spent the whole night at work feverishly praying for forgiveness and the right attitude. I'm still not there. I have moments of forgiveness and peace, but then I fall back into defense mode and wanna go kick her tail. What? I'm human, and she attacked me publicly! But, for her sake, and for the sake of her friends, who were right on board for the Diane-and-all-Christians-out-there bashing session, I apologized for offending her and removed the offensive material.
Maybe tomorrow I will stop being mad about it.