Craziness

I told you I wouldn't leave you hanging.
I lied.
Mostly because I was hanging the whole time with you.
You didn't think I'd leave you out there alone, did you?!?!

So, I didn't get what I wanted. (exactly)
I might get part of it, but it's okay, I guess.
Meanwhile, since I wasn't getting any word about my wish, I decided to start looking around for something different.

In case you haven't figured out what I mean, I'm talking about a job.

A very good friend of mine had a baby recently, and a little birdie suggested that I might enjoy keeping said baby when said friend returned to work. The more I thought about it, the more I liked the idea, and the more I liked the idea, the more I LOVED the idea. And the more I LOVED the idea, the more I OBSESSED about the idea.

You get the, er, idea....

Anyhoo, I mentioned the idea to my friend, and got a pretty strong glimmer of hope that it might happen, but alas. It is not to be. Actually, I may be keeping the baby one evening a week for about an hour and a half, but I'm not sure.

Meanwhile, I finished getting the budget in order, and surprise, surprise, surprise! (insert Gomer Pyle voice...) The budget looks impossible. I really believe that God wants me to put Hailey in school this fall, so we had to consider other options. Shawn works full time and also goes to school full time, so he cannot get a second job. Which leaves me...
I have been technically unemployed for the past six years, which is hogwash, of course, and I never finished college, so I don't have much in the way of marketable skills.
But I used to work for FedEx, and left with a very good work record, so I went this morning and applied to go back.
The application process went well, and they told me they are hiring aggressively, so I could be at work in less than a month.

As my other friend says...

Craziness!!!

Praising in the storm

Overload

...is pretty much what I feel today. My town has experienced a devastating flood. The reports said something about 10-12 inches of rain in just a matter of hours.
On Saturday, May 1st, I got a message on facebook to come to the church because it had been flooded. They were calling for volunteers to come help clean it up. By the time we got it mostly clean, and they told us that the insurance company had professional help on the way, I decided we ought to go check my in-laws empty rental, just in case. I wasn't surprised to find water in it. Shawn stayed there while I went to pick up his mother, who is in town supervising the repairs from the damage done by the broken water pipe. On the way to get her, I got my first look at the water level. Already a trailer park and the funeral home and everything in between was neck-deep in water. People were being rescued by boat.
And that was BEFORE the levee broke.
And BEFORE the Loosahatchie River overflowed its banks.
And BEFORE the water crested.

Thankfully, the only room that got wet in my MIL's house has a tile floor and the water was easily removed.

The rest of the town wasn't so lucky. The military housing was evacuated.
The trailer park was evacuated.
Several whole neighborhoods were evacuated.

Houses were destroyed.
Things were destroyed.
Possessions were ruined and lost.
People were in shock.

But not one life in Millington was lost.
I can't even say that without crying.

My church opened its doors to the Red Cross and became a shelter. The staff and the membership began pouring out love for our town. Other churches, restaurants, and businesses stepped up. The donations came flooding in, and I don't use that word lightly. There were mountains of clothes, shoes, household items, personal items, cleaning supplies, and everything and anything you can imagine.

And then there was the organizing. This is NOT my strong suit. I am a worker bee. A very good worker bee, but not an organizer. Organizers just amaze me. There were SO many ladies and children everywhere sorting, folding, organizing all the donations, organizing the people and what their needs were, then helping those people by filling orders for all the things they needed.

The whole operation was organized chaos, at best, but the love was overwhelmingly evident.

It isn't over, as the cleaning teams are still out there helping clean out the mess, which could take months, and people are still without homes, but the crisis has been met with confidence and God's love.

One of the flood victims who sings in my choir gave a very moving testimony which I will never forget, and I still hear that little song in my mind...

"This little light of mine...
I'm gonna let it shine...."

Warning! Danger Will Robinson!

You know when you want something really badly, but you are afraid to say anything, because you don't want to ruin your chances of getting what you want?
Well, I want something.
I want it really badly.
It's all my sister's fault.
She is so bossy.
(or it might be that she knows me so well, that she knows when a suggestion at just the right moment will encourage me to do something I might not have considered before, but whatever. She's still bossy, and it stinks that whenever she suggests something, I usually end up doing it. Like homeschooling. And stopping homeschooling.)
Meanwhile, this perfectly planted suggestion is growing like a raging fire in my heart, and I need to stop obsessing, or I'm going to make somebody an offer they can't refuse, and it will be a burden on me sooner, rather than later, and I will resent it.
Whew!
Just needed to vent.
Hopefully, I won't leave you hanging forever on this one.

Testing, testing...
This short post brought to you by the amazing technology of SMS...
carry on.

(non) chocolate covered

I don't have much to say these days. I admit that I have been cheating shamelessly on Blogger, with the suave, debonair Facebook.
How can I resist such appeal of posting in short, choppy, third-person-sentences, from the comfort of my cell phone.
I suppose I could splurge and add internet access to my cell phone package, but where would that leave my darling facebook?
Meanwhile, Caleb offered me something today that reminded me of this joke:

A pastor goes to the hospital to visit one of his church members.
As he is sitting there, he spies a bowl of peanuts, and helps himself.

After he leaves, the patient scowls to his wife,
"You know how long it took me to suck the chocolate off of those?"

So, thanks for the offer, but I'll pass on the pile of almonds you have extracted from the almond kisses, but thanks.

Overwhelmed

Last night we had our Easter program at church. We always do a pretty big presentation with a musical play. This year was no different.
I was telling the kids today, over lunch, that I can't really watch it while it's happening, because I might just bust out bawling. The whole story is overwhelming to me.
In our world of instant entertainment, our kids have a hard time grasping the reality of what they are seeing.
Sure, that's just a man playing the part of Jesus.
Sure, that's just fake blood on his body, and they are not really nailing Kevin to that cross.
But the reality is that the REAL Jesus was beaten so bloody that he wasn't even recognizable.
The reality is that they pierced His holy hands with spikes, and nailed His torn body to a cross, where He had the humiliation of hanging for all to see.
But the part that overwhelms me, is that when He took upon Himself my own sin, which made Him unpleasing to His Father, God forsook His own Son.
For me.
For you.
God laid on Him the iniquity of us all, so that by His stripes, we would be healed.

There is a penalty for sin. God says that penalty is death.
Eternal death.
But I don't have to pay for my sin, because Jesus did it for me.
How is it possible to feel so overwhelmingly unworthy, and so very thankful, at the same time?
I don't know.
But I do.
Do you?