Life lessons

From the gas station:

The sign says NO SMOKING! We can see and smell the smoke wafting from your palm where you nestle a cigarette inside your curled fingers. And we DON'T WANT TO DIE IN A GASOLINE FIRE because you refused to obey the rules.



If you had to wait in line before you even got to the pump, and the line continues to pile up behind you, HANG UP YOUR PHONE WHEN YOU ACTUALLY GET TO THE PUMP. We don't really want to continue waiting in line for you to even BEGIN to pump gas!

From the lawn mower:

Sometimes God does something to get your attention just to say, "You don't belong here! Go someplace else!" It would be wise to listen. And during the instructions, if the message comes in the form of a rock hurled at your leg at mach 1, don't scream. Just turn around quickly and exit. Be thankful it wasn't your child that was hit. Or your face.