Tuesday, June 3, 2008

A price worth paying?

Let me give a quick Zaccheus update because what I really wanted to blog about is more serious than usual, and I don't want to disrespect it by adding it on at the end.

He is doing very well. Smaller than his litter-mates, to be sure, but considerably more ferocious, as he needed to be to survive even this far.

I am currently weaning him onto soft puppy food, and trying to make sure he still gets all the nutrition he needs. Why I can't get him to drink water from a bowl or water bottle is beyond me, but I have stopped letting him suck on my fingers for comfort's sake. If he needs to suck, he will have to swallow the water I am drizzling into his mouth. He likes to play with his toys, and really wants to play with Roxy. Cricket is more interested in him these days, but I suspect it has more to do with the fact that she'd like to steal his puppy food, than any other reason. She still jumps back when he tries to play with her. In fact, he had her cornered the other day, and she jumped vertical to get away from him.

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I have been reading a blog I found on another one I read often. It is written by Angie. Her husband, Todd sings with Selah, one of my favorite Christian groups.
Todd and Angie have been through some of the hardest times this year, and I have cried buckets reading every word she has written. You should go there and read it, too. But take a box of tissues with you. You're going to need it. And I recommend you start at the beginning of her story. It took me two days, but it was worth reading.
I have never been through anything remotely like what they've endured, but I am very close with someone who has. And I have to tell you, I have learned something by reading Angie's story. I should have already known it, maybe already did, in a way, but forgot. The ones who have the closest walk with the Lord are the ones who go through the hardest things. The unthinkable things which we are sure would break us. Those are the people who have to rely on God to actually help them remember to breathe. I told Shawn last night that as much as I'd like to have a walk that close with Him, I am ashamed to say that I'm not sure I'm willing to pay the price.
My mundane day to day living seems like a walk in the park to what some folks have gone through. I have never been face to face with such Earth-shattering pain. My sad little pathetic excuse for a life has been easy in comparison.
They say that you shouldn't pray for patience, because trials work patience, according to the Bible, and who wants to go through trials, anyway?
I have a friend who recently challenged the saying that God doesn't give us more than we could handle. She said that she thought maybe He does, to make us lean on Him more. And she wondered what my take on it was. My answer was that I agreed with both, to a certain extent. We really have no idea what we can bear, because God gives us grace in the time of need, not before. He told Paul that His grace was sufficient for him. We can worry and fret, or we can trust. We can cry and ask why or we can believe. We can fight and blame God or we can ask how "this" can glorify Him. We can do all these things, but it doesn't change who He is. It doesn't change the measure of His grace. It is sufficient, either way.

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3 comments:

Lorrie said...

Alrighty, I'll check out the blog. But I have to tell you..I DON'T like to cry! At all.
I really really like Selah. They are the ones I listen to when I feel like really worshiping. When I need to sing along with something that has meaning.

The Boyds Family said...

Ok, I'm going to go check them out...thanks!

Eeyore said...

From one who has been up close and personal to my own version of life shattering pain, just know that for those looking in it often looks unbearable. We often say, "I could never endure that." God reserves the power to hang on to those in the fire, not necessarily to those watching on. The hope here is watching that He does. When you do experience a terrible tradgedy, you can be sure that it will be extended to you as well.