Thursday, June 4, 2009

I think she hates me

There is a woman in my life who hates me.

At least, that's my impression, anyway.

Once, when I was newly married, she asked me what my favorite fruit was. I said "strawberries." Then, for the next eight years, she proceded to buy me all manner of kitchen accessories that had anything to do with strawberries. Strawberry plates, strawberry towels, strawberry tea pot, strawberry egg timer, a giant strawberry cookie jar, it went on and on for years, until I finally told her that I was out of the strawberry phase.

Last year, out of the blue, she sent me a little comb with a miniature tiara. It was really pretty.

For a four-year-old.

Then, for Christmas, she sent me a real life-size tiara.

I wore it a few times as a joke.

It actually has been used in real situations twice, by my daughter and niece, who had reason to get gussied up, and needed a tiara. I was all like, hey, I have one of those! You can borrow mine! Ooo, ooo! Pick me!

For my birthday this year, I got a box full of random items. There were some clothes (which don't fit either my body, nor my style), some body lotions that smell really yucky, some cute Pier One bath gel doo-dads that come in plastic packages that look like frogs or something, a baseball cap, and a tea for two set. (that looks like a rose)

Ummm, okayden.

Yesterday UPS called in the morning, and asked for my daughter. I told them she was a child, and could I, her mother, help them. They had a package to deliver to a Hailey Thomas, but the address was wrong. What was our street number?

When it showed up, it was bedding, ordered by HER, (the one who hates me) and shipped directly to my child.

It is hideous.

While we were looking at the catalog that came with it (to see what we can exchange for the hideousness), Hailey pipes up with, "that's the one Caleb's getting." She's pointing at a set with zebras running across the bottom of it.

Oh, no, she di-n't! It was even worse than the one Hailey got.

Okay, so I lost it. To Shawn, I wailed, "Why is she DOING this to me!!!???"
He SO doesn't get it.

Is it too much to ask that I be allowed to decorate my OWN HOME???!!!

I know I should be thankful that she is thinking of us.

I know I should see it all as love.

I know I am whining, and she doesn't really hate me. (so refrain from stories about how your sombody or other hates you)

But......

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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11 comments:

Joanna said...

Oy vey! You could try to see who can out bad gift the other one. See something nasty? You know just who to give it too.

Send her some of those overnight pads. ;)

Kelli said...

is this the mother, or the mother in law??????

rthling said...

these lips shall never utter!
(but it isn't MY mudder!)

HappyChristian said...

Oh my!
Sounds kinda like family I know...when the time comes to buy Christmas presents or whatever for me, I truly think they just stand in the middle of the store, close their eyes and point and whatever they point to they buy- just to say that they were "thinking" of me!

How does Hailey know what Caleb's getting?

Chris said...

sounds to me like Hailey picked it out... hmm.

Kelli said...

Any chance Hailey and Caleb actually picked their stuff out???

rthling said...

Well, Hailey DID tell her that she wanted to decorate her room with sheep.
She just went from there.
Since she couldn't find one with sheep, she got the next best thing.

Lions.

Umm, yeah, that's the same thing.

Apparently, she told Hailey that she was sending a zebra one to Caleb, so when Hailey saw the one in the catalog, she thought that must be it.

She was right.

It arrived today.

Kelli said...

Was there at least something in the catalog that they actually LIKED????

rthling said...

Well, it's not that THEY don't like the bedding.
It's that I don't like it, and would like to decide how their rooms are decorated.
Right now, their rooms are exactly like they were when we bought the house, which means the wallpaper is gross, so they can use their bedding. But when I re-do each room, it will be relegated to camper bedding.

My Goodness said...

Strawberries and tiaras and lions oh my!!

I'm counting my 'no contact with mother in law' blessings right now! haha!

JMBMOMMY said...

Wow. I am thankful for all the gift cards I get from mine right about now :)